House notes (from Just Thunkin' 9/23/03)

For awhile I Sublet a room in New York city. These are actual highlights from the housenotes sent to me before I moved in.
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"To open the toilet paper holder in the bathroom, simply push in the black button on the back of the holder and it will release the swing arm."

"Never, Ever put any sharp knives that are in the cutting block in the dishwasher or drainer. These are Naomi’s knives, and are to be used only for food preparation. She has requested that we use the knives, then promptly wash, dry and return them to their proper slot in the knife holder, she does not want them to be washed, and allowed to dry in the drainer, as the points may get bent, chipped or damaged. It is fairly easy once you get used to it."

"If you happen to know that you are going to be away overnight ahead of time or away for the weekend, please be so kind as to tell them, or by leaving a note on the refrigerator ‘writing pad’ so that the girls will not be expecting you and can properly turn off lights and lock doors at night, and know that they will not disturb you, since you will not be around. (By the way, the board on the fridge is cleaned by wetting a paper towel slightly and wiping off with water, and then drying it off). "

************ Ah, to be treated like an idiot. It took my weeks to figure out how to use the shower curtain. If you would like to rent from her, please call Naomi at 212 316-3334. She likes to be called well past midnight. Just tell them I sent you, and thank them for screwing me out of $500.